RP: Assault and Battery N⃥o⃥t⃥ Included

(OOC: Initially reserved for Megavolt and Quackerjack...s, will open up later due to probable chaos)


 

Seemingly overnight, toys started to vanish from the toy stores and toy departments all around St. Canard. This would have been a disaster for holiday shoppers, except that all video game systems and video games were completely unaffected by these thefts. Those were still completely available, and in fact, were now likely to show an even greater increase in sales.


Security footage showed that electronic toys had suddenly sparked into life, grabbed inert playthings, and marched out under their own mysterious power.


Frankly, it's not that mysterious.


As one might correctly suspect, Megavolt was behind this series of thefts, although the targets were atypical for him. But, he had his reasons.


"This'll teach that crummy clown to not be so... crummy!" Megavolt declaimed, arms raised, as the various toys marched or rolled by and stacked up in the dreary warehouse. "Ditch me, will he? I should have known better than to be friends with someone who doesn't have a wattage rating!"

    • Nega-Quackerjack
      Nega-Quackerjack

      "Look, M-Megsy..." a slightly quiet voice stammered from the back corner, looking around at the toys with slight intrigue. "This is all very, very nice, but I don't quite see the point! Couldn't you two just talk it out peacefully, over a nice cup of tea? That's what me and my Megsy do, anyways..." they asked gently, still not totally aware that Megavolt still thought he was a split-apart sad version of the prime play-timer.

      • Megavolt
        Megavolt

        Megavolt dropped his arms and turned to glare at Quackerjack, although not the specific Quackerjack he was targeting in this particular scheme. "Don't interrupt my invective! That was rude."


        Quietly cantankerous, he said, "Anyway, I already tried to talk to him and he hung up on me. That's what led to all this," Megavolt pointed at the growing horde of toys. He then gave Nega-Quackerjack a dismissive wave, saying, "Eh, what would you know, you're the sad Quackerjack."


        Eyes rolling upwards as he crooked a finger over his upper lip, Megavolt muttered, "Now, where was I... oh, right..."


        Raising his arms again, this time with his hands clenched into sparking fists, Megavolt turned back to address no one in particular and exclaimed, "With all of these toys unavailable for purchase by holiday shoppers, there will be a spike in video game sales! Digital entertainment will become further entrenched in the culture of St. Canard! Demand for physical toys will face an even greater precipitous decline except in specialized collectors markets largely dominated by adults who will not even be playing with them!"


        Megavolt put one hand on his hip and his other hand to his chin, murmuring, "I forgot where I was going with this. I kind of lost the thread."

        • Nega-Quackerjack
          Nega-Quackerjack

          "Uh, you were talking about how you were gonna make it so that no one bought regular toys anymore, and..." they paused for a second, looking confused. "Well, uhm, who am I to try and help! You just do... whatever it is that you're doing. I'll watch and, uh, do whatever it is you would like me to do."

          • Quackerjack
            Quackerjack

            Quackerjack started to notice the problem. It wasn't immediate, and he sort of suspected it was his head doing the thing again, but when his own toys he planted in toy stores started ditching shelves to walk off on their own, he realised this could be a big problem. 

            And he was NOT HAPPY. 

            He knew who had done it. How could he not? 

            "TUSKERNINI? HOW DARE YOU STEAL ALL THE TOYS IN ST CANARD?? THINK OF THE CHILDREN!" 

            He had pogo-hopped over to the walrus' hideout aggressively and kicked open the door. Right in the middle of... a shoot apparently. One of the penguins was dressed in drag and another was holding her (him?) in his arms while flowers rained down on them. 

            "Cut! What's all this? Don't you know it's rude to interrupt a film in progress?" the villain-turned film director shot Quackerjack a glare. "Now we have to take this scene all over again!" 

            The clown blinked. "Wait, it wasn't you?" 

            Moments later... 

            "MEGAVOLT? HOW DARE YOU STEAL ALL THE TOYS IN ST CANARD?? THINK OF THE CHILDREN!" 

            Huh. The lighthouse was empty. Oh, come on. All this shouting was killing his throat! And his foot was hurting from constantly kicking the doors open! 

            Ooh, didn't he usually place a tracking device on his toys? 

            "MEGA- cough, wheeze, hack, how daRE YO- cough cough, you steal all tHE TOYS IN ST CANARD?? THINK OF MYyyy...?" 

            What was he supposed to say again? 

            "Look what you made me do, Sparky! I forgot my nicely rehearsed spiel!" 

            • Nega-Quackerjack
              Nega-Quackerjack

              "Oh! Hello there, other-me." Nega-QJ waved cautiously at the panting and tired version of himself. "I knew you wouldn't be happy - well, because if i were you (which i sort of am), I wouldn't be happy, either... Would you like to talk about it?"

              • Megavolt
                Megavolt

                Megavolt started a little bit when Quackerjack burst in. He had not actually intended to lure the clown to the warehouse, but clearly he had not thought things through.


                "Argh! Don't call me SPARKY!" Megavolt jumped up and down in outrage, his fists up in the air and crackling with electricity, tendrils of energy grounding on his helmet's plug blades. He thrust his arm forward, pointing accusingly at the newly arrived Quackerjack. "This is all your fault, anyway! I never would have done this if you weren't such a jingle-headed booby!"


                Then his arm swung around to point at the resigned and less villanous Quackerjack. "And you! Get over here and smush yourself back into this Quackerjack! Also, stop trying to bring about a peaceful resolution! It's really getting on my nerves!"

                • Nega-Quackerjack
                  Nega-Quackerjack

                  "Oh, my..." Nega-QJ began to tear up, but did as he was told. Going over to his other-self, he gave him as big a hug as he could and grinned sheepishly. "Does this count as smushed?"

                  • Quackerjack
                    Quackerjack

                    "Jingle-headed booby? Oh, you are so asking for it!" Quackerjack shrieked, rolling up his sleeves. "You took away all the toys! What are children gonna play now? What'd they ever do to you?" 

                    • Megavolt
                      Megavolt

                      Rather than remain angry, Megavolt clapped his hands together and started to titter, dancing back and doing a gleeful little turn. This might be a good time for Nega-Quackerjack to find a safe spot.


                      The electrokinetic supervillain's arms spread out to show off the piles of toys that had so far been collected, arrayed behind him and to either side, like big heaps of colorful fun. "Oh, I didn't take everything, though, no siree! The children will still have something to play with!"


                      Megavolt took in a deep breath, then lunged one step forward, hands balled into fists as he hollered at Quackerjack, "VIDEO GAMES!"

                      • Nega-Quackerjack
                        Nega-Quackerjack

                        "Oh goodness!" Nega-QJ looked frantic, not sure what to do. On one hand, they could protect... Themselves? On the other, they could listen to their only newfound friend.

                        At the mention of video games, however, Nega-QJ realized that this was NOT going to end well for his other self. Instead of running away, they simply clung to their other self tighter, hoping for the best and preparing for the worst.

                        "It's not like there's a better option, anyways..."

                        • Quackerjack
                          Quackerjack

                          Oh no he didn't! 

                          Pow! 

                          That was the sound of Quackerjack's fist slamming into Megavolt's face. He also smacked a hand against his Negaversian's face to pry him away, blind to everything else but his anger. Move aside, weird My Little Pony version of me. 

                          "YOU SON OF A-" he then moved to tackle and punch the rat. "VIDEO GAMES ARE NOT GOOD FOR KIDS! YOU KNOW MY TOYS ARE THE BEST EVERYONE DESERVES!" 

                          • Megavolt
                            Megavolt

                            Megavolt staggered back from the first punch, clutching his hands to his vibrating muzzle, checking to make sure his two front incisors were still there. "Owww, you--AUGH!"


                            Surprising no one, Megavolt was not good in a hand to hand brawl. Especially when the hands were fists and were hitting him really, really hard. Tackled to the warehouse floor, he had his arms held up before his face to try to shield it as Quackerjack clobbered him. "Ow! OW! Leggo, you--owW!"


                            If only he had a weapon! Oh, wait. He kind of was a weapon, wasn't he? Right. Right!


                            The prongs on Megavolt's helmet started to glow blue and then crackle as electricity coruscated down around his cowering body, turning him into something of a living bug-zapper. "Yeah, well... take that!"

                            • Quackerjack
                              Quackerjack

                              Quackerjack was zapped about a foot away from Megavolt, charred and black from head to toe. "Ow! No fair, Garbagemouse! Take that!! And this!!" 

                              He tossed his wind-up clacking teeth at Megavolt. And a jack-in-the-box. From which sprung a giant stuffed shark. 

                              • Megavolt
                                Megavolt

                                "What? How was that not fair, but those are?" Megavolt fled from the chattering teeth, running across the warehouse floor. With his attention focused on not getting chomped, he did not see the jack-in-the-box in his path until it was too late.


                                He skidded to a stop and turned to run from the suddenly deployed shark, only to be confronted by the snapping teeth. So, immediately forgetting the jack-in-the-box issue, he turned to flee from the chattering dentures again, and let out a horrified scream as he was immediately eaten whole by an enormous toy shark.


                                Could that be the end of Megavolt?


                                Apparently not, because the shark suddenly sizzled as it was surrounded by scintillating sparks. A moment later, it exploded into soft chunks of charred fluff and other stuff. Megavolt stood there, looking angry and electrified. "That does it!"


                                He stormed over to the nearby power outlet, plugging in the electrical cord he kept coiled at his belt. The lights for several blocks around started to suffer a brownout, waxing and waning as the irritated rat began to drain the grid to charge up.

                                • Quackerjack
                                  Quackerjack

                                  "HaHA! Got you!" Quackerjack said triumphantly, but his victory was short-lived when Megavolt zapped himself free of the shark. 

                                  "No, THAT does it!" he announced angrily. Grabbing some sort of balloon material from his pocket, he began... pumping furiously. 

                                  "Wait, wait, waaaait..." No time to see the spectacular light show or feel threatened by Megadolt's increase in power. Gotta keep pumping. 

                                  And then, with a bang, a cannonball was sent hurtling towards Megavolt. Quackerjack was now in an inflatable cannon mecha as big as a monster truck. 

                                  "Hmph. I guess I'm ready! Aaaare you, Sparky?" 

                                  • Megavolt
                                    Megavolt

                                    Megavolt was glowing with the energy he was drawing from the power grid, tendrils of electricity jumping out from him and grounding against the floor and wall. He was raising his hands palm upwards and about to laugh when that cannon shot nearly took off his head.


                                    Flat on the floor with his hands clutched over his helmet, Megavolt peeked up and saw the massive hole in the wall where he had just been standing. The cannonball was moving on to destroy some other stuff, because there was no sense is losing good, useful momentum.


                                    Baring his teeth, Megavolt pushed up from the floor and to one knee. "Don't..." He stood up, a little hunched over, power swirling around him as he was still connected to the industrial outlet. "Call..." The lights started to fluctuate wildly.


                                    "Me...." Megavolt thrust his fists up as if trying to punch the ceiling. Every light on the block snuffed out. And then the next block, and the next block, and the next, a sudden pattern of darkness racing towards the city center.


                                    "SPARKY!" Acting as a furious conduit for St. Canard's power supply, Megavolt was a maelstrom of electricity. A surge of it blasted upwards and explosively took out about a third of the warehouse ceiling, sending a fat lightning bolt into the sky like an angry flare. The power transformers up and down the nearby streets detonated loudly from the feedback, and that was the cue for the rest of the city lights  to wink out.

                                    • Quackerjack
                                      Quackerjack

                                      Quackerjack barely blinked at Megavolt's little temper tantrum. A giant piece of rubble bonked down on his rubber mecha, but it barely did any damage, bouncing off to smash the wall behind him. More ceiling crumbled. 

                                      "Good job, SPARKY, now you shorted out the whole city again!" 

                                      He then sent another cannonball at Megavolt, then charged forward to give him a good punch. 

                                      • Megavolt
                                        Megavolt

                                        Despite the amount of power throughput he had during his tantrum, Megavolt was still brimming with electricity. He jumped up and down and uttered a garbled yell that was something like, "ARGLBLGHGELBLGH!" when Quackerjack called him 'Sparky' again.


                                        Extending his arms, he sent a furious lightning blast at the incoming cannonball, causing it to go an incandescant white. It exploded so thoroughly there was barely any shrapnel.


                                        "GRAAH!" Megavolt moved his arms outwards and power arced from his fingertips into the piles of toys. The battery powered and electronic playthings sprang to life, and began to converge on Mecha-Quackerjack.


                                        That didn't help much with the punch, though. Megavolt just got a wallop that sizzled on contact and sent him flying through the air. When he hit an intact portion of the wall, he left a scorched spread-eagle MegaSilhouette on it before he slowly slipped to the floor. He shook his head vigorously in an attempt to refocus.

                                        • Nega-Quackerjack
                                          Nega-Quackerjack

                                          As the fight grew more and more intense, Nega-Quackerjack looked between himself and his not-really-friend with growing.. was it frustration? Neither of them wanted to get along, and worst of all, no one wanted to listen to him! This was getting out of hand, and they feared scolding the duo wasn't going to help at all anymore.

                                          With a cautious motion, he lunged in to grab one of the toys before quickly scurrying back towards the corner. They really didn't like having to do these kinds of things, but they had no other choice. With only one little robot, they figured they couldn't do too much, but things could always be worse...

                                           

                                          • Quackerjack
                                            Quackerjack

                                            First, Megsy decided to kidnap all the poor toys of St Canard, which would force kids to turn to those HORRIBLE video games. Then he decided to taunt and bully his poor former friend. And now, he was turning the toys against him?? 

                                            THAT DOES IT. WHATEVER RELATIONSHIP THEY WERE IN RIGHT NOW, IT WAS OVER. 

                                            "Turn the toys against me, would you??" he raged, charging over to attack Megavolt again. "Turn THIS!" 

                                            The mecha suit fired more clacking teeth. 

                                            • Nega-Quackerjack
                                              Nega-Quackerjack

                                              There! Perfect. Nega-QJ smiled to themselves, patting the newly re-fitted electromagnet robot on the head. Sure it was a teensy-weensy little bit unstable, but if all went as planned, this would at least deter the fight a little bit. 

                                              Placing the toy on the ground and winding it up, the little robot made its way towards the battle. But instead of continuing towards the toymaker as the others did, it simply lifted up its arms, acting like a giant magnet and drawing all of the other tiny robots towards it. Slowly, the robot began to whir, and hum - and then explode, leaving a mass of charred and broken robot parts in its wake. 

                                              This was not going to end well, but at least it got their attention... right?

                                              • Megavolt
                                                Megavolt

                                                None of this was going to plan. Granted, Megavolt's plan had been:

                                                1. Be mad at Quackerjack(s)
                                                2. Get revenge on what was probably Quackerjack Original by making video games even more popular
                                                3. Profit. Wait, no--Bask in the heady glow of vengeance well done

                                                Things had been going okay until step 2, which was a real problem in a three step plan.


                                                Now that other Quackerjack was getting in on it and starting to destroy the only things in the warehouse he could directly control.


                                                "Gang up on me, would you!?" Megavolt shook a defiant fist, then scrambled to his feet and ran as he got chased by more chattering chompers. "Yeek!"


                                                Jumping out of the big hole in the wall left behind by the earlier cannonball as well as that massive electrical discharge, he panted, "I gotta get more energy!" But he'd already caused a city-wide blackout. Flinging his arm out to point dramatically, he exclaimed, "To the power plant!"


                                                "I'm not sure why I say stuff like that out loud, it's not like I'm talking to anyone but myself," Megavolt mused introspectively, as he took off running down the street.

                                                • Nega-Quackerjack
                                                  Nega-Quackerjack

                                                  So, attention NOT gotten, then. Great. Maybe Nega-QJ could convince himself to join forces with him (this whole situation was still as confusing as ever, if not more so by this point). 

                                                  "Hey, other-me! I, well I blew up all those troublesome bots! I could help you catch your fri- new enemy!" They stammered out, approaching the mech and guarding themselves with some broken bot bits. "After all, I'm you! And he's, well, getting away!"

                                                  • Quackerjack
                                                    Quackerjack

                                                    "Hey! Get back here, you jerk!!" Quackerjack yelled, shaking a mecha-fist at Megavolt. 

                                                    He stared down at the pastel clown, then rolled his eyes. "I suppose I can use you." 

                                                    He grabbed his softie double and plopped him on his back, then proceeded to chase after Megavolt, leaving an even bigger hole in the warehouse wall. Then the whole warehouse collapsed.

                                                    The streets were not faring any better. Was he supposed to care that he smashed half a house, caused a dozen car accidents, accidentally stepped on a puppy's tail, and derailed a train? No! He was gonna make that jerk pay for all the misery he caused! 

                                                    And on that night, St Canardians received a grim reminder... 

                                                    • Megavolt
                                                      Megavolt

                                                      Upon hearing the loud smash of the warehouse collapsing, Megavolt glanced back over his shoulder. What he saw chasing him made him scream and redouble his running speed, even though he was already panting from exertion. He ended up leaving an ionized dust trail in his wake.


                                                      There was nothing quite like the terror of having a really angry clown in an inflatable mecha suit storming after you and wanting to twist you into a variety of balloon animal shapes to lend you some serious stamina.

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