RP: Cupid is as Cupid Does

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CRACK.

Negaduck had been knocked out of the sky by one angry blood witch, colliding with a floral Valentine's Day display that wilted on contact.

With no help to correct, all he had to do was clamber out and ready a return... dang, seemed like he had left all his other regular weaponry in his other diaper. 

A beat of those little black wings confirmed they too were busted. So all he had going was the stupid bow and arrow bit.

Fine. He was a master of combat. He'd crush this witch with one hand tied behind his quiver!

Except a few things then happened in quick succession.

"Hey Negawimp!" Gosalyn shouted toward the malicious masked mallard. "I'll bet you couldn't beat me in an archery contest!"

"Hey, NegaDork!" The blue jay, Feliciana, grinned as she approached the other- but it wasn't her normal happy grin, this was a grin filled with mischief and malice. - "Got some good news for ya!"

"Oh come on," Negaduck gestured at the enclosing trio. "You're not meant to turn your hate on me! People don't fall in love with Cupid you know!"

There was a whole wide world that could take their undeserved hostility. Why point it in the direction that actually deserved it?

    • Agent Gemini
      Agent Gemini

      The blonde witch riding a snow shovel made a beeline to land as fast as possible. Her trajectory at first would have her slamming shovel pole first into Negaduck's chest. Instead though her heeled shoes pressed down like the shovel had invisible car brakes. The handle stopped at just a tap on Negaduck's chest.  It was hard to deny if she hadn't stopped the handle could have easily gone right through him.

       

      “Unlucky for you, I believe in things worse than death,” Faustina let out a cackle before she lifted a her hand, which was glowing red quite ominously.

      • Gosalyn Waddlemeyer Mallard
        Gosalyn Waddlemeyer Mallard

        "You're too nasty to be Cupid!" Gosalyn protested, adjusting her Quiverwing Quack gear.  She had no idea who the other two were, but she was determined to stop the diapered deviant.  Nocking an arrow, she took aim and was about to fire when out of nowhere appeared a witch on a snow shovel. 

        "Keen gear!" she cried.  "You must be a sorceress like Morgana!  I don't think she can fly, though.  Neat!  Can I take a spin after this?"

        • Feliciana Carioca-Pistoles
          Feliciana Carioca-Pistoles

          "I agree with the kid, you are too nasty to be Cupid...But there are different ways to give him pain other than being physical..." She smirked deviously. 

          -

          "For example, I broke into his loot stashes here in St. Canard and turned it all into ice cream. Now the only thing he's rich in is melted dairy products." She chuckled.

          • Negaduck
            Negaduck

            Negacupid had been backing up until he caught that gloat. His attention - and rage - snapped to Miss Potato Salad herself.

            "You WHAT?!" How dare she avenge herself! "I'll show YOU pain you pile of- COME ERE."

            Launching at the witch to the neglect of the other two. The resulting brawl knocked him and his gear around - in fact his quiver came right off, tumbling onto the sidewalk.

            Not that he noticed. He didn't need stupid arrows to do damage when he had his fists and a whole lot of fury.

            • Agent Gemini
              Agent Gemini

              Faustina seemed amused in this random child's interest in her magic

               

              “Hrm maybe,” the blonde witch answered Gosalyn while dodging Negaduck's first hit. She was very nonchalant in her dodging, only swaying her ride on the shovel to shift her body to dodge.

               

              When she was about to answer Feliciana’s suggestion was when one of Negaduck's fists unexpectedly made contact. Her low flying shovel reared up. The shovel end scrapped against the pavement, making a sound equivalent to nails on a chalkboard. Faustina put both hands on the handle of her broom to gain control.

               

              The red energy she had moments ago had dropped like it was now a physical object. It plopped, like a ripe tomato that still had a magical glow.

              • Gosalyn Waddlemeyer Mallard
                Gosalyn Waddlemeyer Mallard

                "Whoa, you can do that?" she asked Feliciana with wonder.  "Major league impressive!"  It seemed she had two witches on her team.  This shouldn't last long, right?

                When the blue jay was jumped, Quiverwing looked around in earnest for something to stop Negaduck.  Luckily it was at that moment that he lost the quiver, and she snatched it up eager.  "Awesome!"  Taking out an arrow, she stabbed the glob of magical energy and aimed toward Negaduck.  At least she hoped so, it was hard to figure out where he was in the dirt cloud.

                "Here's a taste of your own medicine, Negadork!" she cried, firing the arrow.

                • Lilly Teal
                  Lilly Teal

                  She had had an excessively, excessively bad day. Why was everyone so nasty? So rude? Oooooh it made her so mad, sometimes, having to deal with people.

                  And she knew, somehow, that her bad day was Negaduck's fault. How? She didn't know but wasn't everything his fault at the end of the day? Yes. Yes it was. And the next time she ran across him she was going to give him a piece of her mind.

                  Angrily carting some groceries home, head filled with visions of what she would do or say if she ran across him again, she came upon the fight. Her usual reaction would have been to stay well out of the way, but the second she saw that black mask, she followed her new instincts.

                  And her new instincts commanded her to take a tiny of condensed milk out of her bag and heft it directly at his head. Hopefully it would connect with a satisfying clang.

                  ... or would it connect with the magic orb? Did magic and dairy products mix well?

                  • Negaduck
                    Negaduck

                    Bonk.

                    The tin connected with Negacuck's skull, making him turn around to its source with a snarl. Then Gosalyn loosed. As a result the superpowered hate arrow copped him square in the back.

                    The bow clattered to the pavement as he fell. As with the others, the arrow dissolved as the effect was absorbed, leaving him struggle to his feet, dazed and swirly eyed.

                    What had they done?

                    Literally, what had they done?

                    "You... all of you.. are going to be sorry..." The gathering rage storm seemed to break entirely. "You wasted any of your time and many, many talents on me, I mean I'm not worthy, and you're so amazing and lovely and unique."

                    Hate plus hate equaled... gushing?

                    "Wow, are you flying on a shovel?" Before anyone knew what was happening, he had yonked it. "That is so amazing. Turning an ordinary object into a doombringer is totally my jam!"

                    Was he hugging it? Too late, he had dropped it and had scooped up Feliciana by the cheeks.

                    "And aren't you cute! Ruining my life's work like that! How adorable!"

                    Spinning around to turn his wanton admiration to the effect's next victim, whom happened to be Gosalyn.

                    "And as for you-"

                    Presumably it would end there, as presumably someone would intervene. Someone please intervene.

                    • Queen Malicia of St. Canard
                      Queen Malicia of St. Canard

                      "YOU."

                      Did somebody say intervention? 

                      Negaduck found himself snagged by the cape and dragged into the iron grip of one raging bull - er, demon. Same thing?

                      "I am going to disembowel you, string you up by your guts, and use your testicles as a piñata!" Flames flying off her tongue with every syllable. "You cowardly, pathetic little-" 

                      • Negaduck
                        Negaduck

                        SMOOCH.

                        The ultimate expression of admiration, right on the bill.

                        Exactly what Malicia always wanted to: being liplocked by a deviant in a diaper.

                        When he pulled away, he couldn't even meet her eyes, but a shy little smile and a flush coloured his cheeks even through the feathers.

                        "I love it when you threaten gruesome bodily harm."

                        Wait, if an act of love cured the hate arrows, what would cure him?

                        • Feliciana Carioca-Pistoles
                          Feliciana Carioca-Pistoles

                          The blue jay fell when the mallard had lunged himself onto her, though she just as easily kicked him off.

                          -

                          Standing up, she dusted the dirt off herself and readied to return the favor when the duckling had given Negaduck a taste of his own medicene. This should be interesting--

                          -

                          --ly annoying...Who knew that adding hate onto hate would cancel it out and make it love? She thought the hate would have just doubled.

                          -

                          If she filmed this and showed it to the criminal underworld, his reputation would be ruined and he'd become a laughing stock! That's exactly what she'll do!

                          -

                          However as soon as she magic'd herself up a camera, she had became the next victim to the nice Negaduck.  Gross. He touched her. What kind of diseases was she going to get now?

                          -

                          Thoughts for later as with a snap of her fingers she had once again used her magic to turn him into something-- not food this time, but she turned him into the very creature he loathed-- a fluffy white bunny!

                          -

                          "Now he looks way less repulsive. Though I have to admit it isn't satisfying to turn him into that given what the arrow's turned him into..."

                          • Agent Gemini
                            Agent Gemini

                             

                            Faustina was a little dazed with her initial crash and the chaos around her. When she was getting up she was glad to see the child had fired her dropped spell. The can to the head from another figure just added to the chaos.

                             

                            Things got more confusing for her when Negaduck's reaction to the spell was not as she had planned. The witch didn't even know how to react to the complement to her shovel, “Uh… you… what?”

                             

                            The blonde witch quickly snatched it up once Negaduck released it. She began to cast a red ball of magic again. She paused when unexpected to her a demon showed up well. Faustina mulled for a moment that maybe her sister was right about avoiding open area fights in this city. This all sure was odd.

                             

                            And then in a blink the target was a bunny. Faustina gave Feliciana a ‘what the fudge’ look while she disappeared the red spell in her hand by making a fist. What kind of school of magic was that blue jay from? She scoffed, “I can't get revenge on him when he's in that form.”

                             

                            Faustina started another spell as she approached the bunny. This time she was weaving her fingers like she was playing an invisible cat's cradle with herself. If her aim was true with the spell, Negabunny would back to  being a duck. If it wasn't though, there could be odd combinations from being a personified rabbit to a duck that still had a cottontail.

                            • Queen Malicia of St. Canard
                              Queen Malicia of St. Canard

                              Negaduck was grabbed by his lips. "I WILL RIP YOUR BILL RIGHT OFF YOUR F-- huh?" Suddenly she was holding a fluffy bunny. Which, for some reason, made her even angrier. 

                              BUNNY SMASH. 

                              • Gosalyn Waddlemeyer Mallard
                                Gosalyn Waddlemeyer Mallard

                                "Huh?" Gosalyn blinked, completely taken aback by Negaduck's abrupt and uncharacteristic change in demeanor.  "What happened?"  She looked around for an answer, and took a step backward when he suddenly came at her.  Thankfully a very tall, very foreboding demoness interrupted.

                                "Eww, gross," she gagged at the kiss, then she laughed when the mallard became a red-fedora'd rabbit.  Glancing at Faustina, she said, "You might not be able to, but I can!  I've been wanting a lucky rabbit's foot..."  Of course she was joking, but Negaduck didn't need to know that.  She rolled up her sleeves and snatched the fluffy white ball by the delicate back leg.  Who knew if Faustina's spell would change what she had in her hand.

                                • Lilly Teal
                                  Lilly Teal

                                  So many things had happened in such a short time that Lilly was reeling slightly.

                                  Oh. Oh he was a bunny. We can't hurt a bunny.

                                  ... can we?

                                  You know now that she thought about it, she wasn't feeling very charitable towards bunnies. And it wasn't fair that everyone else was getting a chance to hit him. Malicia had just stormed in, and the other lady had gone and turned him into a bunny just to make things difficult for everyone.

                                  It was about then that Gosalyn grabbed a back leg, and Lilly brightened up. What a good idea! Sharing!

                                  "Hello miss Malicia," she said as she come forward to grab another hind leg and give it a tug. Her voice wasn't her usual friendly greeting but a fairly unconcerned 'oh you are here' that didn't suit her. "Give others a turn."

                                  • Negaduck
                                    Negaduck

                                    At the initial bunny blast, he had looked down at himself - or what remained of himself - and back up at Feliciana.

                                    "See now I hate myself and want to die-" Announced way too cheerily. "Well done!"

                                    There was a lot of plucking and pulling, ending with the little Negabunny held like a life net, pulled in four directions.

                                    Then with a zap he was back to normal, so to speak, and for all their sakes he was out of the cupid outfit and back in his regular costume. How kind. To them.

                                    "Haha! This is agony! You hate me all so much, I'm -ngh- so proud!"

                                    At least if he were going to die, it was at the hands of a group of ladies he had helped find the true path of hatred. 

                                    • Mother Goose
                                      Mother Goose

                                      "YOU!" Oh look, one last woman scorned was joining the party- it was Mother Goose.

                                      It seemed she'd tracked down the demonic cupid following the string of destruction caused by the sea of raging hearts. The witch elbowed her way into the dismemberment party, not to recuse Negaduck as it turned out, but to whack him over the head with the Cupid bow so hard the wood snapped.

                                      "You give love a bad name!" she hissed at the concussed duck.

                                      "So sorry, ladies!" Mother Goose called into the crowd. Negaduck wasn't the only one looking dazed- the broken bow must have broken the effects of the hate arrows, judging by the sparkling glitter and sudden blinking. Just to safe, however, the fairytale witch started passing heavily discounted, post-valentine's day chocolate kisses around.

                                      There.

                                      Totally covered.

                                      • Agent Gemini
                                        Agent Gemini

                                        Faustina was first seeming to come to Negaduck's defense before the others moved to tear him apart, “Hey, Hey, HEY. What did I say? There's things worse than death I want to put him through first. I can-”

                                        When Mother Goose’s attack hit its mark, there was an abrupt pause to Faustina's dialogue. She then gave her own head a shake.

                                        “What the frick…??? Just? Ah hell,” when her focus was on Negaduck and the attackers she went into a more defensive mode. Both her hands glowing red as she gathered her bearings mentally, “Alright. Let's all slowly back this up and chill a second.”

                                        • Queen Malicia of St. Canard
                                          Queen Malicia of St. Canard

                                          Mal shook herself out of a daze. "Hmm?" She rubbed her head for a moment.

                                          And then resumed strangling Negaduck.

                                          "YOU DIAPER WEARING DISEASE." She screeched as discount kisses (of the chocolate variety) were attemptedly shoved down his gullet."How dare you shoot me, what if those arrows had hit my beautiful face?!" 

                                          Ah yes, back to 'normal'.

                                          • Gosalyn Waddlemeyer Mallard
                                            Gosalyn Waddlemeyer Mallard

                                            "Aww, I wanted to whack'im!" Gosalyn groused when Negaduck fell to the ground with a splitting headache and a split bow.  Then she frowned at Faustina.  "What?  Are you serious?!  This is Negaduck, he's practically begging to be ripped apart."

                                            She realized she still had the hate arrows on her back, but should she use more of them?